Pain
by karynadissa
Summary: Sofia is 16 right now. And ths is a story for her painful feelings.


I enjoy the scene, the flower, the environment. Every surrounding near me, I'm going to miss them. I remember how exactly what I feel when I entered this front yard for the first time. The feelings of anxious, nervous and excited. All mixed inside my heart when I've been told that I'm going to be Enchancia next princess. Now the feelings are coming back to me, in the different time.

I can feel Amber is sitting next to me. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, of course I am". Hopefully.

"Just tell me when you're ready, I'm giving you some privacy" whispered her softly, like telling some secret formula to make a delicious cake.

She knew my answer is Yes. She's rushing to the carriage, leaving me alone with the tree and all of the quiet. My heart punding a little bit faster when I realizing about the coronation. Am I deserve it? Or not? I don't even know how to answer that such question to myself.

A big kingdom, big responsibility, that all will be handed to me and James. But then my tears start to come out, remembering a tragedy. I still remember their wide smile and laugh, without thinking all of the stressful things and pain. I miss that time. I remember what is my first ball was. The young me, with Amber and Dad, dancing waltz, feeling happy.

I still remember how about my experience at the Troll's cave with Dad. He sticked with me and listened to me. Oh how much I miss his strong grip when he was hugging me. Or maybe my Mom's comforting voice. She never let me down, she will always try to comfort me until she did it. Her hugs, her scents, her features.

Everything.

I miss everything from both of them.

I still remember that night, when James and Dad were fighting. It was because when Mom and Dad were going to have some works to do at somewhere else, and like usual, Dad asked James to take charges. But James was busy doing his Algebra Homework, his mind were all stress and he was dizzy, he doesn't realize what was he talking about. That noght, James was mad at Dad, talking about his sickness of being unnoticied Prince and more.

They were mad.

They were shouting all over the castle.

Amber was locking herself at her room, sobbing all over the night. And I'm, I'm relaxing my mind and hugging both of my parents. My feelings weren't good that time. And I guess my feelings was right, there was a horrible accident happen. I still remember how shaky we were, Amber was fainted, James was crying and I'm frozing.

My brain stop working, I don't know what to do. I don't remember a thing, but James said that I kept closing my ears, shouting like a mad person. "NO! THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!" and I'm pulling my auburn-brunette hair. Crying hardly. A fragile pre-teenage who can't accept fate.

But I remember when Ms. Fauna, Ms. Flora and Ms. Merryweather were shooking their heads, knowing that they can't do anything for both of my parents. The Royal Physician said that the most traumatic person among three of us was me. Yes, I'm shocked. Yes, I thought that was just a bad dream.

But my parents dead can't be denied and it's making me suffer everyday, cause since that night, I can't sleep well. Every night, the night incident when Dad and James were fighting keep replying in my dream. But in my dream, I can't do anything. I keep shouting and crying but no one seen me. I wish I begged them to stay.

And after the first nightmare, the second nightmare always keeping up at the next night. It was when my parent's body was sent and showed to three of us with Ms. Fauna, Ms. Flora and Ms. Merryweather. I still don't remember anything when I'm shouting like a mad person, but in that dream I keep touching my parent's body, memorizing every inch of it.

Nothing the same after that accident, James become more serious and stress. Amber always faint and cry suddenly, sometimes I heard her sobbing in her room. And I keep sitting in the park's bench, seeing everything and crying like this time.

Today was the coronation day. Amber said that she can't handle everything, she still shock just like me. But I'm better in hiding my stress, not like her. It's been one and a half year since the accident. I think, it will be the last tme of me, sitting on the nech for being princess, not the Dutch.

"Sofia, come on. Please make this coronation things quick" begged James. I just realized that he is standing right there. "Can I sit?"

I nod and wipping off my tear. "Are we going to be fine?"

"Yes Sof" James answered me, hugging me tightly.

I cry when he start to hug me. Letting go all of my pain from the one and half year ago. I cry because I know I have to end this painful routine sooner or later. James just rubbing my back slowly, comforting me.

"I-I I miss Mom a-and D-dad, I-I need t-to se-see them" I said, manage to control my emotions.

James hug me more tight, keep comforting me. "Everything is going to be alright Sof, I promise that."

I cry harder and sobbing. James is helping me, and I feel much better. But I need to cry until I feel empty, the empty space for the new feelings instead of pain.


End file.
